2000 Duff Beer 400 Fantasy Edition

2000 Season Fantasy Edition (Duff Beer 400 @ Dover Downs Int'l Speedway, September 24th, 2000) Edit

Notes Edit

  • Curse-words will be censored out by *bleep*s.

Car Numbers, Sponsors, Manufacturers, and Drivers Edit

  1. 1 Pennzoil Chevrolet (Jimmy Neutron)
  2. 2 Miller Lite Ford (Rudy Tabootie) (playoff contender)
  3. 3 GM Goodwrench Chevrolet (Eddy "The Intimidator" McRich) (playoff contender)
  4. 4 Kodak Chevrolet (Remy Buxaplenty) (playoff contender)
  5. 5 Kelloggs Corn Flakes Chevrolet (Imaginary Gary)
  6. 6 Valvoline Ford (Professor Finbarr Calamitous)
  7. 7 PHILLIPS Nation's Rent Chevrolet (Wanda)
  8. 8 Budweiser Chevrolet (Homer Simpson)
  9. 9 Kodiak Ford (Mojo Jojo)
  10. 10 Aaron's Pontiac (Jimmy from "Ed, Edd n Eddy")
  11. 12 Mobil 1 Ford (Snap White)
  12. 14 Conseco Pontiac (Nelson Muntz)
  13. 16 TV Guide Ford (Buttercup Simpson) (playoff contender)
  14. 17 DEWALT Power Tools Ford (Evil Jimmy Clone)
  15. 18 Interstate Batteries Pontiac (Ed"Lumpy" Monobrow) (playoff contender)
  16. 19 MOTOROLA Ford (Eduardo)
  17. 20 Home Depot Pontiac (Eddward "Double-D" Marion) (playoff contender)
  18. 21 CITGO Ford (Princess Morbucks)
  19. 22 CATERPILLAR Pontiac (Sandy Cheeks) (playoff contender)
  20. 24 DUPONT Chevrolet (Timmy Turner) (playoff contender)
  21. 25 Michael Holigan Chevrolet (Trixie Tang) (playoff contender)
  22. 26 KMART Ford (Bubble Bass from "Spongebob Squarepants")
  23. 28 TEXACO Havoline Ford (Sheldon J. Plankton)
  24. 31 LOWE'S Chevrolet (Blooreguard Q. "Bloo" Kazoo)
  25. 32 Tide Ford (Blossom Neutron) (playoff contender)
  26. 33 Oakwood Homes Chevrolet (Mac Kazoo) (playoff contender)
  27. 36 M&Ms Pontiac (Spongebob Squarepants)
  28. 40 Coors Light Chevrolet (Bart Simpson) (playoff contender)
  29. 42 Bellsouth Chevrolet (Cindy Vortex) (playoff contender)
  30. 43 STP Pontiac (Bubbles Turner) (playoff contender)
  31. 44 Hot Wheels Pontiac (Kevin Shovelchin)
  32. 45 Spree/Sprint Chevrolet (Sheen Estevez)
  33. 55 Square-D Chevrolet (Stanley S. Squarepants)
  34. 60 Power Team Chevrolet (Francis Bull-E)
  35. 66 Route 66 KMART Ford (Fuzzy Lumpkins)
  36. 71 Real Tree Chevrolet (Cosmo)
  37. 75 Redcell Ford (Patrick Star)
  38. 77 JASPER Ford (Rolf)
  39. 88 Quality Care Ford (Lisa Simpson) (playoff contender)
  40. 93 Amoco Pontiac (Evil Officer Mike Brikowski)
  41. 94 McDonald's Ford (Squidward Tentacles)
  42. 97 John Deere Ford (Penny Sanchez) (playoff contender)
  43. 99 EXIDE Batteries Ford (Denzel Crocker) (playoff contender)

Race Winner Edit

  • 99 EXIDE Batteries Ford (Denzel Crocker)

Number Of Laps Edit

  • 400

Number Of Cautions Edit

  • 11

Fights/Tempers/Confrontations Edit

  • #40 Bart Simpson vs. #16 Buttercup Simpson (in the final laps, Duck stepped out for a moment to get indigestion medicine, unaware of an oilspill at the entrance of Turn #1. Barttercup was out front with Bart leading and Buttercup 2nd. Buttercup accidentally rooted Bart up the racetrack 3 times after running over that oilspill spot, which soon unwittingly infuriated Bart. With 2 laps to go, an angry Bart let Buttercup get by him, only to WRECK her in Turn #1 by surprise. The angry playoff crowd booed him as he was parked by NASCAR, and #99 Denzel Crocker ended up winning the race instead of Bart. After being severely spoken to by Jack Fassler in the Team Fastex hauler, Bart decided to show Buttercup WHO'S BOSS. In the Simpson's hauler, Buttercup tried convincing him that it WASN'T her own fault, but Bart accused Buttercup of bumping him on purpose,creating a huge argument. Fed up with Bart's accusive behavior, Buttercup left him to go to her sister, Blossom and Jimmy Neutron's hauler, hoping that Bart would realize that Buttercup never bumped him on purpose. They never spoke to each other for a whole week until the Pokemon 400, when Buttercup saved Bart's life after a crash that nearly made him drown in water, then the 2 made up their quarrel, and Bart realized and learned from his mistake.

Quotes Edit

Quote 1 Edit

  • (wiki-special opens at a truck stop near a greasy fast-food restaurant called "The Grease" (as seen on the "NASCAR Racers" episode, "Flag Bearer") on a late Thursday night (around 9:30 pm), on the way to Dover Downs International Speedway, as a greyhound bus pulls up*
  • Lisa: *exits the bus and sniffs* UGH! Not another truck stop!
  • Squidward (as he exits the bus / annoyed with a headache): Oh, my aching head! Why did we have to ride this bus overnight anyway?! *groans*
  • Spongebob (as he exits the bus): Because, Squidward. Early to rest, early to get to the next racetrack! *laughs*
  • Squidward: *grumbles underneath his breath*
  • Patrick (as he exits the bus / stupidly): Hey, Spongebob, you think this is some ugly-lookin' racetrack?!
  • Spongebob: Uh, Patrick, this is a truck stop, not a racetrack. Pay closer attention, please.
  • Patrick: Sorry, Spongebob.
  • Timmy (as he exits the bus): So, Mr. Fassler, when do we get to eat? I'm starvin'!
  • Bubbles (as she exits the bus / in unison, her stomach grumbles in extreme hunger): My poor, little tummy is crying of hunger!
  • Jimmy (as he exits the bus / in unison to his stomach grumbling): My tummy needs food!
  • Rudy (as he exits the tour bus): Long bus rides REALLY can make ya hungry.
  • Jack Fassler (as the team was still getting off the bus): Don't worry, guys. We'll feed you all something.
  • Duck (as the team was still getting off the bus): This place has the best greasy food in America.
  • Bart (as he exits the bus): BOO-YA! Greasy food and sugar calls my name!
  • Bubbles (relieved / as the team was still getting off the bus): Yay! Dinner at last! My poor tummy was grumbling for food. *stomach grumbles and she groans in hunger*
  • Jimmy (as the team was still getting off the bus): Hot diggity dog! Finally, I get to eat!
  • Ed (as he exits the bus / stupidly): Hot dogs?! I'll have one with lots of mayonnaise!!! *laughs*
  • Bloo (as he exits the bus / annoyed with a headache): *growls* Ed, will you ever shut up?! I mean, Geez Louise! And don't remind me of Cheese! (referring to the imaginary friend in various Foster's episodes) My head is spinning right now! We had to ride this bus ALL NIGHT and for a stupid racetrack! *groans* And why are we at another fu--*bleep*--ing truck stop, Mac?!
  • Mac (as he exits the bus): Bloo, calm down. We're going to that famous greasy-spoon place that takes place at this truck stop.
  • Bloo (as the team was still getting off the bus): HMPH! Whatever. As long as the food doesn't taste like that dump in Plainsville! (in reference to Joe Tabootie's butcher shop/deli restaurant in "Chalkzone")
  • Kevin (as he was getting off the bus): Just chill, amigo. Alright?
  • Jack: Me and Duck are now going into the place to confirm the reservations me and Duck made hours ago during the bus ride.
  • Duck: You will all definitely love this place. *he and Jack leave the scene and walk to "The Grease" to confirm their reservations*
  • Bus Driver: Hey, Duck! Are we gonna get gas?!
  • Lisa (annoyed): Probably. *scene cuts to inside "The Grease" with the team eating dinner*
  • Duck: *eats his cheeseburger and chews noisily (as he did in the "NASCAR Racers" episode "Flag Bearer")* You sure you don't want a fried pie with your burger Lisa?
  • Lisa: Erm...that's ok. I don't take after my father much and ugh... I think I'm gonna go to the restroom... while I can STILL WALK.
  • Duck (with his mouthful / as Lisa left for the men's room): Hey!... uh...don't you want your onion rings? *pauses and then eats Lisa's onion rings*
  • Timmy: So Bubs, you think you're ready to tackle the Monster Mile this Sunday?
  • Bubbles: I'm not just ready....I'm hardcorrre ready! Those monsters in Monster Mile will be finished! Beaten by cute...little...Bubbles!!!!
  • Jackie: No, no, no, no Bubbles. "The Monster Mile" is actually the nickname of the Dover Downs International Speedway we will be racing on this Sunday, and the reason why it is called "The Monster Mile" is because off Turns 2 and 4 are tight, so tight that a driver can easily pow the wall if he or she's not careful. So technically, the exits of Turns 2 and 4 are the "monster".
  • Bubbles (in relief): Oh, sorry. I was only prepping myself by pretending to pound the likes of such monsters. And to protect my Timmy bear!
  • Timmy: Awwww.... I know, Bubs. *kisses Bubbles on the cheek to sooth her* And plus, monsters would still exist if Jimmy Neutron hadn't already made them extinct as well as their source.
  • Bubbles: Right, Timmy. *giggles*

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  • ("ESPN Speedworld Theme" plays)
  • Bob Jenkins (ESPN / in unison to the playoff crowd cheering/roaring loudly in the background): We're here live from track known as The Monster Mile, Dover Downs International Speedway for Race #2 of the "Chase For The Cup" Playoff Series, and for today's running of the Duff Beer 400! The Monster Mile has ALWAYS been the biggest nightmare on the NASCAR Winston Cup Series schedule with it's tight end-corners and serious racing. Many drivers had tamed the "monster" and who will be the one to do so in the "Chase For The Cup" Playoff Series?! Hello everyone, I'm Bob Jenkins alongside former NASCAR Champion and race analyst, Benny Parsons. BP, this track has a lot of monstrosity does it?
  • Benny Parsons (ESPN / in unison to the playoff crowd cheering/roaring loudly in the background): Indeed it does, Bob. Dover Downs International Speedway is one of the BIGGEST threats on the NASCAR Winston Cup Series circuit. This track used to be run on asphalt until the installation of concrete took effect in 1995, and now this track will REALLY smack ya, especially off Turns 2 & 4. Remember, make ONE simple mistake, and the "monster" get ya and "eat up" your racecar. (in reference to hitting the wall off Turns 2 & 4)
  • Bob Jenkins (ESPN / in unison to the playoff crowd cheering/roaring loudly in the background): After last week's win in his hometown in Springfield (in reference to the "2000 Krusty Burger 400 Fantasy Edition" wiki), Bart Simpson looks to continue to build his momentum in time for the next playoff round in time for Amity Park (foreshadowing the "2000 Danny Phantom 400 Fantasy Edition" wiki).
  • Benny Parsons (ESPN / in unison to the playoff crowd cheering/roaring loudly in the background): Indeed, Bob. Team Fastex really might have a better chance at clinchin' the Team Championship with Bart Simpson's playoff dominance. He really proved himself last week in Springfield when he made a late-race charge on Eddy McRich and held off a hard-chargin' Remy Buxaplenty, but the main concern is will that dominance last. Because there are 3 extremely hungry REXCOR playoff contenders who really want to out-perform him and steal the Team Championship away from Team Fastex and run em' out of business. So therefore, Bartholomew Jojo Simpson better watch his back and hope that his Fastex teammates can advance to the next round and knock REXCOR outta contention in these last 9 races of the season.
  • Bob Jenkins (ESPN / in unison to the playoff crowd cheering / roaring loudly in the background): Not only that BP, but Bart Simpson over the week when Team Fastex made their Tri-State area theme park tour (Six Flags, Knobelle's, etc.) shot his new Butterfinger commercial (spoof of Jeff Gordon's 1990's PEPSI commercial, except with a Butterfinger) that made him and Team Fastex publicity huge.
  • Benny Parsons (ESPN / in unison to the playoff crowd cheering / roaring loudly in the background): Indeed, Bob. This young kid has such character and charisma when it comes to television, commercials, and show-biz, and that he knows how to attract racefans around the world.
  • Bob Jenkins (ESPN / in unison to the playoff crowd cheering / roaring loudly in the background): Will Bart Simpson continue his playoff dominance? We will find out in 400 laps here in The Monster Mile. The drivers are ready, the fans are ready, and WE'RE ready for the starting of the engines here in Dover Downs International Speedway! Let's go trackside for the command!
  • Track P.A Announcer: And now for the most famous words in all of auto-racing, please welcome your Grand Marshal, president and CEO of Dover Downs International Speedway, Mr. Melvin Joseph! *playoff crowd cheers/roars loudly*
  • Melvin Joseph: Gentlemen, start your engines!!!! *playoff crowd cheers/roars loudly*
    • engines start and rev loudly, in unison to the HYSTERICALLY cheering/roaring playoff crowd*

Quote 5 Edit

  • Bob Jenkins (ESPN / in unison to the playoff crowd cheering/roaring loudly in the background): Glad you're with us on ESPN, as we are set to go racing in Race 2 of the "Chase For The Cup" Playoff Series.... *playoff crowd cheers/roars LOUDER as the pace-car pulls into the pits* as now the pace-car heads for pit-road! We are all set for 400 laps here inside the Dover Downs International Speedway! *cars accelerate to take the green flag, waved by Moe Slezak, in unison to the HYSTERICALLY cheering/roaring playoff crowd* Moe Szyslak will wave the green flag, and we are now underway in the Duff Beer 400 here in The Monster Mile!
  • Barney Hall (MRN Radio): They come down to the line, green flag goes in the air, and we are underway in the Duff Beer 400. On the break, they haul if off into Turn #1. Down to the inside, Sheldon J. Plankton's tryin' to find some runnin' room, but Timmy Turner's gonna try and get ahead of him outta Turn #2.
  • Joe Moore (MRN Radio): Timmy Turner comes off Turn #2 with a nose out in front of Sheldon J. Plankton, now he swings around and grabs the lead for the first time down the backstraightaway! Francis Bull-E falls in line in 3rd! It's single-file among the top 10 cars into Turn #3!
  • Eli Gold (MRN Radio): Kevin Shovelchin's trying to make a move to the outside groove! Ed Monobrow, likewise will move to the outside of his Fastex teammate, Eddward Marion and pick up a spot! The good battle on the racetrack is back around the 6th position right now, and that is Bart Simpson and Cindy Vortex in Turn #1!

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  • (Lap 397 out of 400 laps)
    • scene cuts to Bart's cockpit*
  • Bart (in 2nd): *after being shoved in Turn #1 to the 3rd lap in a row by Buttercup* WHOA!!! Buttercup, you did that for a 3rd lap in row! What's the matter with you?! *scene cuts to Buttercup's cockpit*
  • Buttercup (in 1st): I swear I didn't do that on purpose! Something's up with the car! *scene cuts to Bart's cockpit*
  • Bart (in 2nd): It's okay! I understand! (in his mind) Yeah, tell that to the judge, Buttercup! *scene cuts to the track*
  • Eli Gold (MRN Radio): They come back to the line to begin 3 laps to go here at Dover Downs International Speedway! It has been an interesting battle between Barttercup, and the question is will this be a 1 & 2 finish? Buttercup and Bart remain side-by-side into Turn #1-- *in unison Bart wrecks Buttercup and himself in Turn #1 and they both smack the outside retaining wall* (with sudden realization) Bart gets her! *crowd exclaims and gasps in horror in unison* HARD in the wall goes Buttercup! HARD in the wall goes Bartholomew! Everybody scatters to avoid a wrecked Barttercup in Turn #1 here at Dover!
  • Barney Hall (MRN Radio): And Denzel Crocker will be the new race leader since the couple had took each other out of the race, and since there ain't enough laps to finish this one under green, Crocker will win this under the caution flag.

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Quote 25 Edit

  • (scene cuts to Barttercup's hauler)
  • Buttercup: *comes in* What the fu--*bleep* is wrong with you, Bart?! You let Crocker win the race and move on in the playoffs?! We could've WON this race if it weren't for your bull--*bleep* move!
  • Bart: *scoffs* BULL--*bleep*?! What about those shoves for 3 consecutive laps you fu--*bleep*--in' made of me, Buttercup?! Was THAT bull--*bleep*?!
  • Buttercup: I kept telling you it WASN'T my fault! There was OIL on the racetrack on the frontstraightaway entering the corner! They should've thrown the caution flag!
  • Bart: HAH! Duck didn't say anything about an "oil-leak"! So therefore they DIDN'T throw the caution flag!
  • Buttercup: *quick gasp* You're calling me a liar?
  • Bart: Oh, you better believe that's what I'm tellin' ya! I'd no sooner trust Sideshow Bob than trust YOU anymore! 
  • Buttercup: *gasps in horror* How could say that about me?! I'M YOUR WIFE!
  • Bart: Yeah, well at least I don't shove love-ones up the racetrack and blame it on an oil-leak when Duck never says anything! Was it that? Or did the car "magically" go up to me and rooted me for 3 consecutive laps?!
  • Buttercup: *shudders violently* FINE! I'm goin' to Blossom and Jimmy's! I-I-I NEED TIME ALONE!!!! *flies off in fury*
  • Bart: Fine! I need time alone as well and take a vacation from your quirks and lies! *scene fades into Buttercup crying on Blossom's bed in her pillow*

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Trivia Edit

  • Since this is the 2000 season, the commentators on TV (ESPN) will be Bob Jenkins (now retired) & Benny Parsons (1941-2007).
  • The MRN Radio commentators for this wiki-race will be Eli Gold & Barney Hall (in the booth), Dave Moody (Turns 1 & 2), and Joe Moore (Turns 1 & 2, backstretch and backstraightaway)
  • The TV pit reporters (ESPN) will be Bill Weber, Dr. Jerry Punch, Marty Schneider, Matt Yocum, and Wally Dallenbach.
  • The radio pit reporters (MRN Radio) will be Winston Kelley, Jason Toy, Steve "The Postman" Post, Jim Phillips, Krista Voda, Kyle Rickey, Alex Hayden, Adam Alexander, and Jeff Streigle.
  • This is the second race of the NASCAR Playoff Series known as the "Chase For The Cup")

Dover Downs International Speedway Edit